Spreading Joy

My Last pic that I took with my Dad. I miss you Daddy!

I need to write more about him, as he was the original Joy Spreader.  Always giving to others, $20, here – candy for bank tellers there, helping out the guy that had a truck load of watermelons by purchasing them all and GIVING them away. Doing all the things I dream of doing.  Making a difference the way I dream of making.    

Until last year with Megan, I can not remember writing any poetry of any kind.  But these words flooded my heart this past week and it’s with tears of joy and sorrow, I’m sharing them with you here.    

No Tomorrow

The times of love, smiles and hugs
The times of grief and sorrow
All have a special place deep within my heart
For with him, there is no tomorrow

I sit and think and smile inside
I wonder what you would say and do
My heart longs to see, to touch and hear you,
To tell you, once more….I love you

Father’s Day is bitter sweet
As you are finally free of pain
My heart and soul realize the miles
As my loss is heavens gain

I love you Dad, I miss you deeply
Your laughter, your love, your smile
This time of separation, free from your hugs
Will make the wait…. all worth the while.

 

Me and my DaddyI always loved kisses from my Daddy

Megan 2009

It’s 2010 and many are asking about Megan and how she is doing.  Here are the entries from her journey in 2009.  Again, my heart is amazed at how many people stepped up, encouaged, prayed and still to this day, ask me – how is Megan.  Lets journey back to November 2009.  Shall we? Love having you walk and talk with me.  It inspires me.

It’s November now.  Meg’s doing well.  Her stomach is working again, she is eating and digesting. It (her stomach) had stopped working completely.  No liquids, no solids – nothing would digest, everything would come back.  As bad as that was, as hard as that was, the worst part was that 2 doctors didn’t believe us.  2 doctors said, you are doing this to yourself.  Imagine, one Doctor, that has known her for her entire life, telling her that “if you’ll simply NOT throw up, your food will digest” or this is in your head…etc. etc. etc. Never had we had a problem with our pediatrician believing us, until this. Even though we told her doctor that she “held” her food in – YES – HELD in so she would not throw it up, for SEVEN hours on the fourth of July, sadly enough, he still didn’t believe us.  I could see it in his eyes.  I could see it all over his face.  He thinks she has been purging all these months. She has not. I am with her each time it happens.

Anyway – back to November.  She has been on medicine that cause her stomach to work, but at such a high price.  The pain it brings is horrid.  I see it all over her.  Every time I force her to take the meds, she has to endure pain so that her stomach will work.  I know there are so many parents who are going through so much worse with their children.  I simply can’t imagine some of the grief many parents go through day in and day out.  My heart goes out to you as you hold on to your precious child. As you journey through each day, one day at a time. As your heart is fearful of tomorrow.

I get a letter from a friend. One who is supporting Spreading Joy but feels like he needs to send an extra blessing along with the letter.  It says not to think, just go with the blessing.  I don’t have to think…I know what to do.  I want my princess to have peace in her stomach. I want her to smile again and be your normal, typical teenage girl.  I want her to have some good times of pure joy.

I don’t have Meg with me.  It’s Saturday night. I gaze at the letter. “All who touch it will receive a blessing. ” I want Meg to have it.  She needs to have this. She needs to smile, laugh and have a good time.  I contact Richard Mayhan, a fellow prayer warrior and friend who God has used to help round up prayer warriors on Meg’s behalf many times.  He knows that on Sunday afternoon, when we go to the altar and pray with Meg, we are praying for special healing and pure joy for her.  I take the letter to church on Sunday. I’m not at my own church because of a death in the family.  Many family members are there and I get separated from Steve and Meg.  I’m reading in my Bible in Matthew where the faith of the friends heal the sick.  I message that verse to Richard and he says that he is there, reading that as well and so is another person. To stay there, pray there – keep my faith right there.  That so far 10 people have agreed to pray with us when we go to the altar.  He is tweeting and asking who will pray.  I continue to pray that I would have enough faith. That I wouldn’t wouldn’t be the reason Meg misses out on a blessing of healing.  There’s 17 that have agreed to pray.  All I have to do is say when we are going to the altar and people all across the United States will pray at the exact same time. I sit in my pew in awe at the amazing friends I have, at the mighty God I serve.  Meg has struggled so much this year.  Her heart has hurt as badly as her stomach because we couldn’t get the doctors to believe us.  I hear back, 26 people are going to pray.  The service is almost ending.  My heart is racing as I hear 35 people are going to join us in prayer.   I give the word, we go to the altar – for a while we - Steve, Meg and myself are the only one’s praying.  WE don’t wait for the Pastor to invite us, no..we go.  Both Steve and I pray for our Princess.  Meg holds the letter. We ask for healing for her stomach as well as her heart.  We want her to be a happy normal teenager again. We get done, head back to our seats. I get the word that including Steve and myself 47 total people prayed at the same time for Megan. Amazing love for a little girl that they have not even met.

Now the faith begins.  We leave, go to lunch. I do not give the meds. She hates them. They hurt her so badly. She eats and the food stays. A week passes, two weeks passes. Still, food staying. No meds, no tears, no “but Mom”, no I need pain medicine. None of it.  I watch and laugh out loud - wow!! She is eating me out of house and home.  I’m giggling and thinking goodness….a few months ago I was forcing her to have milkshakes every day.  She says if she never has another milshake, it will be too soon.  4 weeks passes.  She is doing well. Eating. Gaining weight. While she doesn’t like it, I’m loving it.  Christmas Even rolls around.  The excitement of her brother being home, the festivities, the day itself. It gets to her and she is sick on her stomach.  Christmas day, she is sick for several hours.  Am I swayed – no.

Its now the END of January and Megan is doing well. No medicine and yet still digesting.  The Doctor had told us this was always going to be an issue.  That she would always have a problem.  And – maybe she will, who knows….but right now, as far as I believe, her stomach is working, on its own – thanks to My Lord.

Megan 2010

Oh, the wonderful friend that sent the blessing. He was part of the 47 that were praying for Meg, without knowing that I was using the blessing he sent. I had the honor of telling him sometime later that he was more instrumental than even he knew.  That was a great honor and joy.

If you have gastroparesis, we understand.  We believe you. We know how hard you struggle. Our prayers are with you. We will do all we can to help you walk down this path, and to have joy for your journey. WE will walk with you.

I love prayer warriors.  I love the faith of my friends.  I love how God gives us the desires of our heart. What is it that you need?  What are you praying for? We prayed all year long for Megan. Don’t give up.  Gather your friends and pray  – but don’t give up. Keep going before the Lord, don’t give up.  Keep asking, don’t give up.  Keep gathering with your friends and praying – but what ever you do…don’t give up…keep praying.

What do you need?

Thank you for your friendship, love and care for my princess! I’m blessed to have you in my life!

If you’re alone, I’ll be your shadow.  If you want to cry, I’ll be your shoulder.  If you want a hug, I’ll be your pillow.  If you need to be happy, I’ll be your smile.  But anytime you need a friend, I’ll just be me.  ~Author Unknown

Taken from - "Things That Make Megan's Day"

The little peaceful things!

I love little thing.  I truly do.  Stick around long enough and you’ll probably tire of hearing me say such, but it’s the truth.  I have no idea who said it, but I saw this quote and instantly fell in love with it.

 It’s the little things that make life BIG!

I’ve not been feeling well for a few days, so I’ve been forced to enjoy some of the more peaceful little things in life.  I’m feeling better and but wanted to reflect on some of these little things that I’ve enjoyed these past few days.

Pandora – Love this internet radio.  Anything I want. My favorite is the “Oldies but Goodies” but so many amazing songs, right at my fingertips.  I love music! Praise and Worship, Sappy Love Songs, the Pop Singers from 80, 90 ‘s – such a wide variety of music makes me smile. Ohh… How about the One Hit wonders? We all have our favorite one of those, right?

Sleep – I normally do not take naps because they leave me feeling worse than when I went to sleep. Not true these past few days.  Here is how it looked for me. Do a few things, sleep a few hours. Get up, repeat. Been there? Oh, I’m sure you have been.   I know many people who are power nappers and swear by them.  Please, share how you fall asleep quickly enough to sleep and awaken feeling rested after only 20 minutes! 

Iced Tea – Refreshing, simple – Unsweetened, nothing added to it, iced tea.  Normally coffee is my beverage of choice, but these past few days tea has been my constant companion. The colder, the better.  When the heat is on, you should try it. 

Audio Books – Are these not the best? Other than the fact that I would love to be the voice of an audio book one day when I grow up, I love listening to them.  I love that I can find free ones as well as cheap ones.  I down load a free audio book each month at Christian Audio.  You check out like normal and put in the code and its free!  Where do you find free audio books? What is your favorite?  Have you downloaded older books?

Hand held games – It’s true. I have my very own Game Boy SP, royal blue. I received it for an anniversary present several years ago! I normally carry it in my purse, but will have to charge it before returning it.  I currently hold the 1^st and 3^rd place highest score in Kirby’s Pinball.  The kids lost many of my games over the years, so I’m always on the look out for some of the older game boy games. Love them. 

Sleeping on the Couch – I don’t know if it’s the fact that there is a “back” to the couch or what it is, but I love sleeping on the couch. Maybe I could take naps on the couch and enjoy this simple pleasure a little more often?

Extra Warm Blankets – I Had an issue with getting and staying warm, so piled on the blankets. I love snuggly, warm, extra soft blankets. I’d pull them up close to my chin and just drift off.

Soup – The winter time is wonderful for soup and sandwich meals, at least around my house! Once I could finally keep something down, extra hot egg drop soup was the meal of the day.  The warmth from the inside out is amazing.  Soup, simple, easy and delicious! 

Boy, looking back at this list, I need to make sure I add some peaceful little things to my day more often.  Not only are they peaceful, but fun, comforting and they bring great joy to me! It truly is the little things that make life big! These are just a few of the peaceful little things I enjoy. 

What are the little things that are big in your life? 

What peaceful little things DO you add to your day?

What peaceful little things do you NEED to add to your day?